Sunday, October 25, 2009

American victims of domestic violence abroad

Domestic Violence 101
Domestic violence is a pattern of coercive behavior which may include physical and sexual violence, threats, insults, and economic deprivation which is aimed at gaining then maintaining power over an intimate partner. People of all races, cultures, professions, educational backgrounds, sexual orientations, and socio-economic status experience domestic violence.

Well, this subject had been out of mind for a while. But is now a priority for me. It is estimated that about 113,800 American women each year are abused by an intimate partner.

Nearly three out of four (74%) of Americans personally know someone who is or has been a victim of domestic violence.

One incident of domestic violence is reported to the police every minute (U.S. and U.K.). And it is estimated that about half are never reported. On average, 2 women a week are killed by a current or former male partner.


50% of the men who frequently assaulted their wives also frequently abused their children.


One incident of domestic violence is reported to the police every minute On average, 2 women a week are killed by a current or former male partner.


Twenty-five percent (25%) of women and 7.6% of men experience partner domestic violence at least once in their lifetimes, with women at greater risk of repeat victimisation and serious injury. Women are the victim nearly 80% of the time.

Finding myself moved by a training in Amsterdam taught by Paula Lucas, the founder of the Americans Overseas Domestic Violence Crisis Center, in which I participated last week, I am compelled to begin a new volunteer role (yes, I'm biting off more than I'd planned to chew, but this is worth it). My heart is in this one. It touches me for many reasons.

I'd planned to attend just the morning session, but was inspired to stay for the second part of the training to become an ambassador for the AODVC. The founder, Paula Lucas, told her story.


After a long and terrible ordeal, and despite experiencing homelessness, poverty and extreme debt after years of abuse, Paula felt she had been given a second chance. She resolved to help other abused American women and children around the world so they would not have to go through what she and her children went through. While still living in a shelter, Paula began her work and founded the American Domestic Violence Crisis Line (now the AODVC). Today the center acts as a lifeline to victimes of domestic violence.


Here is a (disturbing) snippet of what she and her children endured for twelve years while living overseas:













To see a more complete article on Paula's story, go here: http://www.866uswomen.org/Founders-Story.aspx

I hadn't thought about it, but I didn't realize how little I'd know about what to do if I found myself in such a situation. Aren't all we expat wives just living the life? For perpetrators of domestic violence, isolation is a key element - and that is so easily accomplished with an international assigment. Job done. That's where it began for Paula (although there were some red flags before then, but she hadn't 'done the math' yet.)


And I thought about the kids.


The reality is that, internationally, neither the victim nor her children have the same right to protection as they do in the States. And resources are much less available to to them. What rights do they have? Where are the laws in the Netherlands? What about in Saudi Arabia? All much more complicated than you'd think. What do you do when your abuser has locked away your and your children's passports?


I sat next to an American women who is divorced from her Dutch violent abuser (who still continues to assault her) but who cannot take her children (who are not safe with their father) out of the country (home to the States) because the Hague Convention offers no exception in cases of domestic abuse. Wow.

So, I've given my first presentation to a group of counsellors at the American School of The Hague, and will continue as an outreach ambassador for the AODVCC.


Incidentally, the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), as it is currently written, does not include Americans experiencing abuse while living abroad are not included in the language, nor are they recognized as a special needs population. Therefore, organizations such as AODVC, which provide regionally-specific services to a globally-dispersed population, do not receive federal funding.

With the VAWA reauthorization approaching, the Americans Overseas Domestic Violence Crisis Center (AODVC) has partnered with extremely talented individuals to form the Americans Overseas Sub-Committee to ensure that this population is recognized as a special needs population for VAWA’s reauthorization in 2010. Please look for oppotunities to support and vote for this recognition.

The same Americans are also no included in the International Violence Against Women Act (I-VAWA) which provides U.S. assistance to non-American victims.

As a woman, and as the President of the AWC, it is my job to be educated about such issues, create awareness, support advocacy and be a resource for American women living abroad when they are in crisis. So it all fits so well. Talk about a sense of purpose.

The AOWDC seeks to help women and children live their lives free of abuse.

Their Mission: The Americans Overseas Domestic Violence Crisis Center works with abused Americans and their children in foreign countries to provide domestic violence and child abuse advocacy, resources and tools so that they can navigate the complicated jurisdictional, legal and social international landscapes, to be able to live their lives free of abuse either in the foreign country or back in the United States. This is achieved via an international toll free crisis line, 866-USWOMEN, accessible from 175 countries, serving a population estimated at 6 million American civilians overseas.

Their Belief: That the best human relationships are characterized by mutual respect, open communication and individual empowerment. The Americans Overseas Domestic Violence Crisis Center envisions a life where every woman's intimate partner treats her with dignity, respect and compassion; where oppression is replaced with equality; where expression of anger is non-violent and where children grow up in violent-free homes with their self-esteem intact.

I believe the same. So I'm getting involved.

AODVC's Global Campaign to Empower Americans Experiencing Domestic Violence Abroad (targeted at 30 cities across Europe, Asia, the Middle East, South America, and Africa) is designed to have a snowball effect. The 300 new Ambassadors trained in this campaign will reach approximately 80 people each through our presentations, directly reaching approximately, 24,000 people.

My job as an Ambassador is to educate and empower different organizations, corporations, universities, and women’s clubs in my country of residence to respond effectively and to understand the issues and barriers unique to Americans experiencing domestic violence in their countries.

24,000 people will then have the knowledge and the resources to help a client, friend, co-worker, relative, acquaintance, or themselves to access the specialized services offered free of charge by calling AODVC’s international toll-free crisis line so that American women and their children can live free of abuse either in their host country or back in the US.

What can you do to help? Well, as a minimum, get educated. If you or someone you know is living abroad and is or could be a victim of domestic violence, you need to know the facts. If you're living in the States, you can be a Crisis Line Advocate - to find out more go to:

http://www.866uswomen.org/Volunteer-Opportunities.aspx

and, of course, you can donate or help raise funds for the AODVC. Go to their web site to find out how and for more information go to: http://www.866uswomen.org/Donate.aspx

Saturday, October 17, 2009

"Be normal, then you will be fool enough."

In an effort to work through my "dip in the W" phase, I was doing a bit of research to better understand the Dutch culture. Perhaps "talking" it out on the blog will help me over the hump.





This is an excerpt from an article posted on a web site entitled Amsterdam Expats: Dutch Culture - see http://www.amsterdam-expats.info/settled/dutch-culture





Dutch culture is based on Christian ideology, which still influences Dutch politics. However, since the industrial revolution, the influence of other ideologies and religions has added a level of complexity.





Dutch society is modern and egalitarian. In general, inhabitants are tolerant, modest, entrepreneurial, and independent. Ambition, education, personal achievement and hard work are highly valued qualities.





The Dutch reject those who flaunt themselves for no other reason than to show off. "Be normal, than you will be fool enough" is a common phrase in the Netherlands. I like it.





Most Dutch people might come across as impolite (and by my own standards, yes, they certainly are at times), by going straight to the matter at hand. This usually makes them seem stiff or uptight to foreigners (that's me). And this is the view that I still tend to have even after having lived here for nearly a year and a half. And it is a habit of many of my American friends to occasionally slip into a "'Dis' the Dutch" session (the things that just drive us all berzerk!)





However, if you get to know them better, it is more good than not (like our friends Anneke and Ray). For example: Almost 90 percent of the Dutch speak English, and most of the people working in the tourist sector also speak German and/or French. Their cultural heritage, artistic and musical legacy, rich history and involvement in international affairs are subjects Dutch people are proud of. As well they should be.



The fact is, I love living here (what a blessing), but there are things about the Dutch, and about expat life anywhere, that will always make me feel a bit out of place, or a bit uncomfortable or frustrated. Can't be avoided, really. It is nice to know that I'm in a good place in my life where I can appreciate the differences and challenges, rather than reject and wrestle with them. I'm still wrestling :)

Friday, October 16, 2009

My sweet nephew Shawn



Recently, my brother Jeff's oldest son (my nephew, Shawn, above) was diagnosed with Mitochondrial disease (MITO), a devastating disorder that occurs when the mitochondria of the cell cannot generate enough energy for the body's demands. Shawn's diagnosis means that we've identified the source of a history of medical problems with which he has suffered since infancy.
There is no cure for MITO, but there are things that can be done to improve his symptoms and slow progression of the disease.
In an effort to support Shawn and his family, and to increase awareness of the disease, I dedicate this blog entry to them. We love you Shawn! xoxo Auntie Leslie and Uncle Alex

In September, Shawn's mother, Sarah, took an active part in a campaign to raise money and awareness for MitoAction as part of Mitocondrial Awareness week (http://www.mitoaction.org/) She raised just over $1,000.

There are many ways you can help to raise awareness, and of course, monetary donations will help. Please visit http://www.mitoaction.org/what-can-i-do for a list of specific actions you can take. Please consider one or all of them.

The most common symptoms of the disease include (and many have already affected Shawn) include:

*Poor Growth
*Loss of muscle coordination, muscle weakness
*Neurological problems, seizures
*Autism, autistic spectrum, autistic-like features
*Visual and/or hearing problems
*Developmental delays, learning disabilities
*Heart, liver or kidney disease
*Gastrointestinal disorders, severe constipation
*Diabetes
*Increased risk of infection
*Thyroid and/or adrenal dysfunction
*Autonomic dysfunction
*Neuropsychological changes characterized by confusion, disorientation and memory loss.

MitoAction's Goals are:
*To improve quality of life for adults and children affected by mitochondrial disease.
*To internationally raise awareness about mitochondrial disorders, and their relationship to other diseases.
*To provide specifc and practical materials that help patients to manage their symptoms
*To aggregate and connect the international mitochondrial disease community.
*To create tools which empower patients and caregivers to be advocates for themselves or their children.

Blayney, I know that a prayer from you could be powerful - would you mind?

FYI, here's a link to the fundraising page from September:

The Adjustment Phase of the W-Curve

When we decided to move to Holland, part of the orientation was cultural training that we received before leaving the States. Valuable stuff for us, and we were so glad we had these sessions before we departed. It wasn't necessarily specific to Holland (those surprises we'd have to discover in a trial by fire :) But it helped set our expectations about the process and how to handle the unique stresses that would present themselves.

As you might guess, there are a series of stages that an expat experiences (not always in the same order, of course, and each stage is longer or shorter for everyone) and I find myself in one of the more difficult stages of adjustment. I think it is comparable to the stages of grief, in a way (and also that one has to experience every stage, some of them more than once, in the process).

I'm in (and I think fair to say, Alex is as well) the 'dip in the W'. The phases of this transition follow the pattern of the peaks and valleys in the letter "W" (aptly named the W-Curve). If you're curious you can find explanations in a quick Google search).

When we first arrived, we were in the "honeymoon" stage. We probably have had a much longer one (honeymoon), in part because we were so well-informed about what to expect and be prepared to deal with changes - which makes an enormous difference. Having found the AWC within two weeks of arriving also gave me a 'safe' place full of Americans all with different histories with expat living - some have lived in several countries, others, like me, doing it for the first time. I had no idea what a critical resource and incredible knowlege-base this would be for me in the subsequent months. And now our Members look to me for guidance - and I'm doing my level best! (And Blayney, I'll continue to beguile them with my New England charm :)

Most things were so new and exciting, curious, funny, strange and wonderful (ok, that's maybe too sappy!) My aunt Nancy says we live "The Life of Riley" - and I'd have to agree to a point. My honeymoon stage lasted for a long, long time! Certainly there are down sides, but I admit that I am very lucky to have this adventure.

But as things normalize and we establish a rather ordinary day-to-day routine, the things we could always rely on in our home countries for comfort (chocolate chip cookies) or as "no-brainers" (pumping gas) still require extra effort. A good example for me was Alex's British accent and local dialect.

For him, in business in the States he had to made a conscious effort to make himself understood (without having someone have to ask what he said, or misinterpret words and phrases he might use in the UK) - something most people don't have to think about in their speech. How exhausting! Knowing that gave me a better understanding of why a Brit who moved to America could struggle with (the Queen's) English ... to (American) English! - and how different could our American culture be from that of our British brothers and comrades? Well, as I learned...loads. And there were so many other little things to think about - where do I buy my groceries, what are the rules of the road? Where's the Marmite (what the heck is that awful stuff?!)?

I'm now in the quite normal stage where (akin to what happens in a developing love relationship) although I still appreciate so many of the differences in this new culture, there are some that are now a source of irritation. What was curious is ridiculous. What was funny is now annoying.

Quite naturally, there are some things that I really miss about the States, and some that have simply fallen off the list of things that are important to me. And I've embraced some new ideas that I might not have otherwise considered much. I see the world a bit differently. I do.

I miss my family and my friends. I miss customer service. I really get annoyed with Dutch drivers. I miss being given what I consider to be 'appropriate' personal space that is just natural in America. I get easily frustrated (even hostile) with 'the way things are' here. I feel guilty on too many days that the Dutch and their "Dutchness" simply make me nuts! ;)

I find it difficult to find some of my core values challenged by a culture that has some very different views. It is hard for me to understand why the Dutch don't value some of the things that to me are just obvious (like my definition of common courtesy and when it is clear that we should form a line at the cash register...) I can't help but sometimes compare what I have here with what I had at 'home' and it is sometimes tough to accept that some things I think should just be a certain way, and here they are not even close.

I'm doing all the right things. I'm very involved in the community, I continue to study a difficult language, I exercise often, I have some very good Dutch friends (as well as others from all over the world). I try to stay in touch with what is happening in America.

Right now I try to focus on the things about the culture that I do love and try not let the little things bug me. And when they do I still try to keep a smile on my face and, when I speak, my words are kind and polite (even if my Dutch is quite imperfect). I'm a guest here in a culture that belongs to the Netherlands, and it is how they've chosen for it to be. I am not a Dutch citizen with the rights that go with that - and I've no right to expect that. Sometimes my rights as an American conflict with the culture and laws here - can be anxiety producing. It feels odd and uncomfortable having lived in a country where I know what my rights are, what the rules are and why they are. It makes sense. Here I won't ever have that level of comfort and belonging.

The not so great stuff? There are some things about this culture that I'll never fully understand, or in fact, accept as right. I will be respectful, tolerant, lawful and polite. I don't ever forget that I'm an acting ambassador for my fellow Americans, either. If I don't behave well, it reflects on them.

Here, to me, it doesn't always 'make sense' :) I don't have to love every aspect of it, but I do have to respect it and I do have to make it work for me.

I'm struggling and know that this is all part of what we're experiencing. And that there will come a stronger autonomy phase (I'd thought I'd been there, but I'd lulled myself into thinking that I'd simply been lucky enough to avoid this more distressing stage). With time, I'll again find a way to more easily accept the similarities and differences and regain the sense of relaxation and confidence that I thought I'd reached.

So, a bit more than halfway through our assignment I have to say I think I'm right on track. I suppose once I reach that final stage it may be time to move to another new country. And even if and when I return to the States, by that time I'll have to reintegrate in the other direction. I already have moments when I'm back that it feels a bit odd, and less familiar to me than I would have thought.

Onward...!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

A Quick Trip to Antwerp








Last weekend I attended a regional meeting of FAWCO Clubs, which was held in Antwerp and included women from Antwerp, Brussels, Den Haag, Paris, Basel and even a woman who goes back and forth between her home in Shanghai to her home in Hungary (no kiddin'!)


Anyway, I took the train to Antwerp on Friday afternoon with my friend Celeste, and had dinner with friends that evening. The Saturday was a full agenda of business for me, and early in the afternoon Alex came to join me. The entire group (about 30 of us, a few hubbies included) had dinner at a restaurant not normally open to the public. We had a traditional meal which included a trout mousse (not my cup of tea ;), some cauliflower and chickory soup (I had mine without the shrimp that most enjoyed), a delicious slow-cooked beef entree - and I skipped dessert but it was something fabulous, I'm sure.


I did walk around for a bit on Friday when Celeste and I arrived, but I didn't take the camera as I just wanted to enjoy the day. We sat in one of the squares for a beer and some people watching.




Unfortunately, as Saturday was a day for business (and a gorgeous, sunny day) what normally would have been a stroll around Antwerp, was a day in conference rooms (a good conference, by the way, and worth the trip - but a shame that such a lovely day was spent indoors.)


I also chose not to take photos of absolutely everyone during the conference (and there were a couple of folks doing just that so it was much more relaxing for me to simply be one of the crew.) The 'official' photographers of the event will post some of the photos on their local Club's website and share them through facebook.

Sunday we had a nice 'lie-in' and then in late morning a pre-arranged tour which turned out to be only a tour of the train station and the area around it (a bit too much station and not enough Antwerp, but it was ok, and interesting).


I'll be back to see more of this city (I didn't even get to look at diamonds!! :O) There is even a zoo right in the city center (not too many animals as they've been relocated since zoos have learned how to better care for animals). No time to see it this trip! I have a standing invitation from the President of the Brussels Club to visit any time - and I will.

This film includes my friends Elizabeth and Rachel, as well as a few crazy football fans that were travelling through the station - and, of course, we all tested the beer...


And for the record, I think Alex will leave me to my FAWCO conferences the next time. Although it was nice and he enjoyed meeting my friends, I think it was simply too many women for the poor guy to handle :) Fair play to him for giving this one a go!




Wednesday, October 14, 2009

"We must learn how to create peace in the aftermath."

This article by Dr. Judith Rich struck me - and I hope you take a look.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-judith-rich/the-nobel-prize-a-tool-fo_b_316984.html


Normally I might be inspired to write my own piece on a subject that I think warrants a post - but I don't think anyone could communicate this message more clearly, accurately or diplomatically than this.


And no, my blog isn't going to become a political or philosophical one. But this sort of thing is all the more important to me as an American (and a human being/and a world citizen) living outside of the States (and so fits with this blog's purpose - to tell you about how our lives are affected by living outside of the U.S.). Because we're surrounded by such a wide international population and culture, and one that is politically very vocal and varied, I learn so much. Which makes me open to learning more.


I think about things now with a bit of a different perspective than I did when I lived in the States, and certainly before I became part of an international family. My views about some things that I thought would remain constant have changed and some priorities have become more important to me, and others less so. Things that used to bother me don't - and new pet peeves surface :o)


Anyway...


The message is an important one.

I'm curious to know what you think after you read this.



Next up: our very short weekend in Antwerp.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Success!

Well, my address to the group at the launch of the 7th Annual Breast Cancer Awareness Month in the Netherlands was a success. And I have now met another handful of very interesting and influential people. U.S. Consul General Julie Ruterbories and U.S. Deputy Chief of Mission Michael Gallagher were among our distinguished guests.

Very unfortunately, the person who volunteered to take some photos for us is unable to locate the camera so you'll just have to use your imaginations on this one ;)

I was very well prepared and my speech well rehearsed, which was a good thing because there was no podium on which to set my notes should I need them - just a slim microphone behind I couldn't hide :) It went very, very well and I was relieved and pleased.

Special thanks to Blayney for his words of encouragement and vote of confidence - it helped!

Also this weekend Alex and I attended an Anglo-American Pub Quiz night (complete with a curry dinner). Our team did dreadfully in the quiz, but it was great fun. And Saturday evening we went bowling (ten pin, that is - and I have only ever played candlepin, so it was a challenge!) with a group from the Club and a couple of new friends.

Next weekend we'll be in Antwerp as I am attending the regional FAWCO meeting hosted by AWC Antwerp.

Today I have an art gallery opening and lots of Dutch homework to do, and Monday morning (bright and early - can you believe I volunteered for this?!) I have another Storytime for the kiddies at the Club. It is a little bit of a substitute for spending quality time with my own nieces and nephews in the States and in Wales - a bit of a "kid fix" if you will.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

A distressing message


Recently I received an e-mail, from more than one source, calling for a boycott of a 'new' postage stamp in the U.S. that celebrates two Muslim holidays. It was intended, I suppose, to get me fired up, upset, and motivated to spread the word - which it did - but not in support of its contents. Quite the opposite.
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The message draws attention to a new stamp (which is not, in fact, remotely new) that celebrates two Islamic holidays. It further lists a number of terrorist events committed by extremist Muslims, and suggests a boycott of the stamp, as "purchasing it would be a slap in the face to those who were victims of those 'whom the stamp honors.'" (If you want to view the e-mail in its entirety, go to http://www.snopes.com/politics/stamps/eidstamp.asp ).
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Normally I ignore e-mails that convey messages that are obviously unresearched and blatantly inaccurate, and/or contrary to my own beliefs and philosophies, and I simply delete them. But this one really made me angry, and sad. It does a bit more than create a ridiculous false hope that Bill Gates will send you a check if you forward an e-mail to all your friends. So I'm talking about it here.
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So let's get this out of the way first - the stamp does not, in any way, honor those who carried out the atrocious acts listed.

I am very much a patrotic American, to which this message is said to be directed. But I vehemently disagree with the message of fear and hatred that it proliferates.

True and genuine patriotism requires that one defend the freedom and dignity of one’s fellow citizens regardless of their racial and religious affiliation.

Like many Americans (and non-Americans), I'm still angry and outraged about what happened on 9/11 and other events to which the message refers. I understand the anguish and frustration of families whose lives have been devastated by such events.

"Islamophobia" like that contained in this message, has, for years, incited violence targeting American Muslim individuals and institutions. Eight years after the 9/11 attacks, American Muslims and Arabs continue to suffer a severe wave of backlash violence. This violence includes murder, beatings, rape, arson, attacks on mosques, shootings, vehicular assaults and verbal threats.
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Did the person or persons who generated the message research the background of the stamp? Or investigate the reasons the government produced such a stamp? Seemingly not. Well, I did.

Just to be clear, President Obama did not direct the issuance of this stamp which, by the way, was introduced in September of 2001 (and reissued in 2002, 2006, 2007 and 2008). Obama had nothing to do with the stamp, which was actually first issued by the Bush administration. Not that it matters. But Obama-haters, get your facts straight. The lack of accuracy in your statements just highlights your ignorance, and demonstrates that your mission is simply to generate propaganda.

By the way, the issue of boycotting the stamps is largely moot, since the stamps are generally specialty items sold only to customers who specifically request them. Moreover, the stamp is an ordinary first-class stamp and all proceeds go to the USPS, not to any Muslim-related groups or organizations. Hardly the point, but worth the clarification.

The EID stamp is not the first or only governmental or commercial recognition of Islamic holidays. Hallmark produces a variety of holiday cards celebrating Eid al-Fitr, and former President George W. Bush extended official greetings, issued messages and participated in commemorations of both Eid al-Fitr and Eid al-Adha - even after the Sept 11 attacks - and promoted the EID stamp via the White House web site. There wasn't a call to boycott the stamp then. Nor is there a call to boycott Hallmark. If the same logic applies, then if they're making these cards, aren't they promoting terrorism? That's preposterous.

In order to be consistent with the logic of attaching blame to an entire group, rather than the lunatic fringe nutcases within that group who are personally responsible for such despicable actions, you'd have to broaden your targets.

Should we boycott Christmas stamps because fundamentalist Christians bomb abortion clinics? Should we boycott stamps celebrating Jewish holidays because of the history of human rights violations in Palestine?

The bottom line is that every religion, culture, race, and nation has things about which they aren't very proud. Are you proud of the fact that we bombed Hiroshima? I didn't think so. If a handful of people who purportedly share your religion commit a heinous act, should your congregation be subject to hate crimes? Of course not.
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Fundamentalist extremists hide behind religious or other groups who do not share their beliefs or participate in their terrorist activities. Religion isn't the cause of terrorism. It is extremists who distort it to promote their personal agendas.
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The facts about the stamp are distorted to promote the personal agendas of the e-mail's creators advocates.
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For the record, Islam does not promote terrorism. Look at the Qu'ran. And most American Muslims (and your fellow citizens) denounce extremism.
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So my message to those of you who support and promote the boycott and continue to forward the e-mail, is "think about it, and think about it carefully." Don't be so easily tempted to condemn the whole bunch, because it's a very slippery slope.
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If you don't want to buy the stamp, then don't - that's certainly your prerogative, but please don't spread a message which distorts the facts and only serves to promote fear, ignorance, racism, bigotry, and hatred.

Here's an excerpt from President Obama's speech in Cairo in June of this year, which refers to the tensions between Islam and the West:

"Violent extremists have exploited these tensions in a small but potent minority of Muslims. The attacks of September 11th, 2001 and the continued efforts of these extremists to engage in violence against civilians has led some in my country to view Islam as inevitably hostile not only to America and Western countries, but also to human rights. This has bred more fear and mistrust.

So long as our relationship is defined by our differences, we will empower those who sow hatred rather than peace, and who promote conflict rather than the cooperation that can help all of our people achieve justice and prosperity. This cycle of suspicion and discord must end."

I couldn't agree more.
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Those who send the e-mail about the stamp include the text "If there is only ONE thing you forward today... let it be this!"
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I'd suggest that if you send only one e-mail today, it contain a message that promotes peace and understanding rather than one of fear and hatred.